Square Peg

Stop acting so small. You are the universe in ecstatic motion.

-Rumi

There is an idiom, “square peg in a round hole” which is used to describe someone who is a bit of a misfit, not fitting into society or the regular stream of life. If you’re practicing yoga properly you are probably a square peg. If you are not a square peg, you are probably not practicing properly. I’m feeling a bit bold today.

In 1992, when I first started to practice yoga, the way I would describe a yoga class was, “a bunch of weirdos in a room together”. It was liberating; I ‘fit’ there in a way that I didn’t even fit in art school (which is already a bunch of weirdos). The class and gathering of people addressed a different need within me. None of us had yoga mats, or yoga clothes. We practiced on camping mats, or gymnastic pads, or, in my case, a wool blanket. I knew that I was not doing exercise; this idea was reinforced by my art historical forays into Indian philosophy. I was connected to a deeper and more true part of myself. It was a different time, but I was a different person as well.

I miss that square peg that was me. I didn’t fit and didn’t want to. And didn’t apologise for it. And there were enough other square pegs around that I had good company.

You might be thinking, ‘there is a way to fit a square peg into a round hole’. Yes, the square peg can become smaller. I don’t recommend this. That shrinking of the self comes at a high cost, and makes for a boring story.

Try to see things differently than most. Give importance to your internal experience. Don’t judge others. Try not to hurt others. Don’t argue. Basic stuff. Take care of your own life first, and own mind first. Actually practice yoga. Do the work. And, as this boy says:

I’d say get ready to not be who you are right now.

-12 year old boy describing how he would talk to himself  pre-cancer diagnosis (if he could go back in time)

Pranams,

njjz

ps. The photos above are of me a few years back when I was injured and not able to walk properly. I had set aside my cane for the photos. My legs were not strong enough to hold me well, so I was leaning “under stand”. It seemed funny to me that the word was divided in such a way.